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Teenagers, like adults, may experience stress everyday and can
benefit from learning stress management skills. Most teens
experience more stress when they perceive a situation as dangerous,
difficult, or painful and they do not have the resources to cope.
Some sources of stress for teens might include: school demands and
frustrations negative thoughts and feelings about themselves.
Changes in their bodies problems with friends unsafe living
environment/neighborhood separation or divorce of parents chronic
illness or severe problems in the family death of a loved one moving
or changing schools taking on too many activities or having too high
expectations family financial problems.
Some teens become overloaded with stress. When it happens,
inadequately managed stress can lead to anxiety, withdrawal,
aggression, physical illness, or poor coping skills such as drug
and/or alcohol use.
When we perceive a situation as difficult or painful, changes
occur in our minds and bodies to prepare us to respond to danger.
This "fight, flight, or freeze" response includes faster
heart and breathing rate, increased blood to muscles of arms and
legs, cold or clammy hands and feet, upset stomach and/or a sense of
dread.
The same mechanism that turns on the stress response can turn it
off. As soon as we decide that a situation is no longer dangerous,
changes can occur in our minds and bodies to help us relax and calm
down. This "relaxation response" includes decreased heart
and breathing rate and a sense of well being. Teens that develop a
"relaxation response" and other stress management skills
feel less helpless and have more choices when responding to stress.
Parents can help their teen in these ways:
Monitor if stress is affecting their teen's health, behavior,
thoughts, or feelings Listen carefully to teens and watch for
overloading Learn and model stress management skills.
Support involvement in sports and other pro-social activities.
Teens can decrease stress with the following behaviors and
techniques: Exercise and eat regularly. Avoid excess caffeine intake
which can increase feelings of anxiety and agitation
Avoid illegal drugs, alcohol and tobacco Learn relaxation
exercises (abdominal breathing and muscle relaxation techniques)
Develop assertiveness training skills. For example, state feelings
in polite firm and not overly aggressive or passive ways: ("I
feel angry when you yell at me" "Please stop
yelling.") Rehearse and practice situations which cause stress.
One example is taking a speech class if talking in front of a class
makes you anxious Learn practical coping skills. For example, break
a large task into smaller, more attainable tasks.
Decrease negative self talk: challenge negative thoughts about
yourself with alternative neutral or positive thoughts. "My
life will never get better" can be transformed into "I may
feel hopeless now, but my life will probably get better if I work at
it and get some help"
Learn to feel good about doing a competent or "good
enough" job rather than demanding perfection from yourself and
others.
Take a break from stressful situations. Activities like listening
to music, talking to a friend, drawing, writing, or spending time
with a pet can reduce stress Build a network of friends who help you
cope in a positive way.
By using these and other techniques, teenagers can begin to
manage stress. If a teen talks about or shows signs of being overly
stressed, a consultation with a child and adolescent psychiatrist or
qualified mental health professional may be helpful.
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